Who wears a wallet chain?!
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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