if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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