so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
