She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
