Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
