I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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