Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize
