Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
