great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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