My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize