Having a random hookup so left but love u
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I am one with the molecules
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
