I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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