Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
