Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
