I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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