Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
