ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
