It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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