Moan for me like Helen Keller
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Randomize
