Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.