I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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