The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize