Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
