i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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