Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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