Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
