Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
