Whatcha textin bout Willis?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
