Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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