Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Randomize
