$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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