Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
