He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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