I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize