You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
