So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
