do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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