either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
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