U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize