I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
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