Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
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they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
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Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.