All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
she pinky promised me she was 18
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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