In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
