it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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