i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
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