I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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