Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i will never coherently bang her
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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