Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
