The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
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I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
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I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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