I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
